Watching these figure skaters makes me want to keep performing! Augh!

Watching ice skating on TV makes me wonder if I should really continue to pursue this " extreme " modest clothing thing and just keep performing until I'm 18. Seeing Ashley Wagner ice skate is inspiring, LOL.

Yet I know that not wearing my modest dress and head coverings would grate on my conscience. Two, financially it would help my parents ( despite what they say ) if I didn't do dance again after this dance year ends. Three, I'm asthmatic, and even though I've danced all these years, it's relentless.

I recall when we were practicing before we went on stage last year for recital, and the dance we were practicing was tap. Tap has especially been excruciating on my lungs, but I can usually get through it and take a puff of my inhaler when I'm done. But while we were practicing, I couldn't finish out the end, I was too out of breath. I raced to my bag and got my inhaler. :/

Jazz, one of my all-time favorites, hasn't been nice to my lungs either, but I've dealt with it best I can. My parents love it when I perform, and in making this decision not to take dance again, I wonder if my dad doubts my seriousness in my decision.

I don't know if I go into asthma attacks or not when I get off stage or I finish practicing. I don't have a good idea of what an asthma attack really is, because most of them have occurred in my sleep, and I've only woke up twice during them. ( I can't dinguish the difference between just being out of breath and experiencing a full-blown asthma attack unless I'm waking up while I have one. )

Anyway, enough explaination about my current state of health, I need prayer: Pray that watching performances won't tempt me into continuing dance for a few more years. This is becoming harder.

Thanks. :) And may Yahweh bless your day, your family, and your life.

I'm a Hypocrite

I have been looking around on the internet for other head covering blogs, and I must admit, I have found a few interesting ones. But it caused me to think more about my current situation:

As most of you probably know by now, I'm a dancer. I've been dancing since I was....maybe 7, and this is my.....3rd or 4th year of competiting. The problem??

Immodesty.

We keep our hair up in ponytails most of the time when we dance because our teachers don't want our hair to...well..." blind " us, you could say, while we're dancing. But the costumes aren't appropiate in my mind if I continue to wear head coverings and modest dress.

So what am I going to do?

I really hope that I'll have the strength to " quit " dance ( not take it again ) after it ends in May or June. But there's a Disney trip coming up next term and I REALLY want to go. ( We've performed there once. )

Right now, I really feel like the Devil is working against me here, tempting me to continue dance. But I feel like a hypocrite dancing in immodest costumes but still wearing a head covering and modest dress in daily life.